|
|
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
Art=Life=Art
WomanKraft has its own self-help guru- the esteemed Shasta Serengeti
Dear Shasta,
Recently, I read the book The Power of Now (Oprah’s pick). I understand that my pain body is an energy requiring self creation of sustained woe that destroys my chance to experience the present...but. Since I have been living in the now, I have become a cheerless, rather bleak person. Formerly, I had many friends who found my insecurities humorous and were always grateful (quietly) to not be me.
Sadly Mired in Life Energy
Dear SMILE,
Is this a question, or rather, the question?
The time to be generous is when you have nothing. I recommend “Spice it Up”, a self awareness class in palatability offered this autumn at WomanKraft. Put some caraway seeds in your beer and leave your headaches behind.
Dear Shasta,
A fortune teller told me to quit my job and follow my art, which I did. Unfortunately, there is no camping at the landfill. How do you avoid the consequences of offering bad advice?
H.F.C.S.
Dear High Fructose Corn Sweetner,
This is not an advice column, but an Add Vice column.
Good luck!
Do you have a question for Shasta? Email beetree4u@yahoo.com with your inquiry and stay tuned...
Life=Art=Life
Dear Shasta,
“How do I stay in the present when the present isn’t long enough for my list?” Stretched in Tucson
Dear SIT,
It would be too easy to respond by saying you are not obligated to accept all presents. However, “list” being a nautical term meaning a vessel that leans excessively in response to a large force, I’m guessing your gift is a habitable ship in a bottle. Something no one would refuse.
It is unfortunate that the bottle is confining enough to preserve the distortion. You must approach the list like an attentive dog with a tilted head. This is the origin of the word “list-en”. The archetypal dog of dyslexia (dog-god) realizes the limitation of mortality and visualizes the gate of the ancient Greek oracle of Delos, One who passes through the gate knows forever the ability to delegate.
May you find smooth sailing.
Art=Life=Art
WomanKraft now has its own self-help guru- the esteemed Shasta Serengeti.
Dear Shasta,
I’ve recently started writing, yet I feel blocked by my lack of literary knowledge. I have many stories to share and feel moved to write, but short of going back to school...What do I do?
(and don’t give me any of that mumbo jumbo garbage either...)
Blocked but Ready
Dear Blocked but Ready,
Your situation reminds me of a 1975 Ford van who is currently encountering a similar challenge. Everything works fine, and the wheels have been removed to prevent sun damage. The strong-and-reliable sits in the yard waiting for that call (it is called a1975 van because that was its “best” year, but maybe not its most useful or coherent year). Returning to school to learn how to write might be like getting a job at a carpet cleaning business and never learning how carpets fly. Being the smartest, best van in the fleet, and being serviced by someone who could care less and forgets to fill the oil can break a block, but is this what you want? It may be better to ease down off a block than to break it. Never forget fluid, maintenance, and tire pressure.
Dear Shasta,
Can you help me? I have been moved to start painting at 3 o’ clock in the morning. My work is coming out fabulous and it has jump started my career. The problem is, my beloved cat hates this schedule. He starts howling as soon as I pick up the brush and then proceeds to spray copiously all over that canvas I’m working! What can I do? I love my cat but this has got to stop!
“PO’ed in Tucson”
Dear PO’ed,
I have always been impressed by the nepetolactone response (a scientific catnip description) of feelines. What is going on in those tiny nasal pores that are lock and key with the subtle vibration of higher order aromatic vapors? Your cat, being the intelligent creatures he is, might need to be addressed directly, “Beloved cat, have no fears! The ingredients I use for my art have all been certified NON-TOXIC by 2 important countries”. Something should then happen, let me know what.
If you have a question for Shasta, by all means, submit your own by emailing beetree4u@yahoo.com (put Shasta) in the subject line.
|
|
|
|
|
Life is Art is Life!
with Self Help Guru (and WomanKraft member) Shasta Serengeti
Dear Shasta,
Recently I sold a piece of art to a project manager at a missile factory. It was more money than I had ever received. That night, I met a person who seemed to be everything I was searching for in a partner. A month later I allowed him to use my credit card. Several weeks have passed and no mention has been made about repayment. My dilemma is that I really, really like him and I can rationalize my loss as a 10% tithe. Is this o.k.?
Flummoxed in Tucson
Dear FIT,
You certainly seem to be in a cycle. A lesser advice columnist would say “view your situation as an investment (you might still need to tithe)”, but not this one. When Mr. Perfect comes over to your house, have him leave his shoes by the door while drinking tea. Excuse yourself, go to his shoes and place under one of them a dollar bill with chewed gum against the soul. If this doesn’t achieve repayment, ditch him. (You might still need to tithe.)
Dear Shasta,
My partner of 6 months is a found objects artist, a difficult medium in which to create livelihood. Our apartment/studio has become filled with found objects waiting to become art. I can work around the rusty springs and industrial gages, but the latest project is too much. He has collected bushels of perfectly shaped cow pies, which are shellacked and painted with whimsical faces. He believes he can sell them to bars. So far, none have sold. He keeps making more of them. I don’t want to squelch his creativity but last night in the dark, I tripped over a bin of cow pie faces and was almost impaled on a bundle of broken car antennas.
Worried in Tucson
Dear WIT,
Take an interest in his work, especially the latest project. Help him paint the faces. The ones you paint should have upside down smiles and the caption “I am very sad” written around the edges. Then carefully drill a hole in the forehead and jam a broken car antenna into it. It this doesn’t bring up the subject so you can negotiate a satisfactory conclusion, ditch him.
Dear Shasta,
I am an aspiring goldsmith. My most recent project required 2 months of work. Now it turns out no one wants to pay even the price of the gold. My parents want me to return to school.
Sad in Tucson
Dear SIT,
Eureka! Return to the dealer who sold you the gold and inform him Archimedes has spoken to the authorities. A refund should be forthcoming.
Dear Shasta,
My 8 year old son is addicted to video games. I paint signs for “Save the Earth” protests/demonstrations and he never gets involved without super effort on my part. He acts like he doesn’t care. We only have a few years left to turn this Earthly situation away from the tipping point. How can we create a broad based mass movement and get the children involved?
Concerned Oregon Parent
Dear COP,
Fun First! Now that the birds and the bees are no longer an issue, what do you see as the broad based mass movement’s role in comforting a fearful child, your child? Maybe waiting until 10 years old is appropriate for discussing such difficult and in-depth issues might yield more interest from your future Earth saving son.
Stay tuned for the next edition of this column, out with the next newsletter
|
|
|
|
|
Tongue and Groove Personals
Is All Love Curious?
Funloving SF Botanist, self-described as voluptuously resplendent (or resplendently voluptuous), seeks research partner for exploration of floral anatomy.
Seed bearers need not apply!
Not your Daddy’s Grease Monkey! This experienced SF knows what’s under the hood and loves to keep it purring. Synchronization and timing are everything in this business. All Classic Models Appreciated!
Professional Ice Sculptress finds herself successful but cold. SF seeks to melt the frozen to renew the creative spirit within. Desperately in need of new heat producing tools. Got tools to share?
Single Dyke Truck Driver seeks partner for long distance hauls. Possible LTR included/not guaranteed. No exp. nec. Dogs welcomed! (Please don’t bring trailer or all possessions on 1st date.)
There are fabulous people around WomanKraft! You never know who you might meet, until you come on down.
This column seeks creative entries as future Personals. Email webmistress Quynn for more info-
|
|
